Portfolio:

“Everything is Falling Apart”


Isaak Newtons undiscovered law:
Machines have an inanimate ability to
secretly communicate to each other.
They conspire with each other,
they plan unilateral catastrophic
failure at the worst possible time.

Is it just me or do things fail to function because of a new governing law of physics yet to be defined. Simultaneously, and without any prior warning it seems like every machine surrounding me is currently malfunctioning right now. I have a computer with a Trojan horse bigger than the one that secured the fate of Ancient Troy. I have an outdoor refrigerator that recently threatened to create a Chernobyl melt down in my out-house. My Cyprio pump in my pond decided to suddenly blow out water rather than suck it in!  My truck’s AC now is blowing hot air in my face at a temperature higher than a welders blow-torch, and to top it all, my toothbrush is currently revolving at 0.001rpm’s . . . well that’s just great!



Combine this with the heat index right now and the endless deluge of vampire mosquitoes and you have straight jacket potential. I have decided at this point to check myself into a local self-help clinic for the domestically
challenged for the remainder of the Summer.



Oh, and needless to say, my Mosquito Magnet is on it’s 10th
reboot after replacing the propane tank, – imagine that! AArgghh!

At least my camera is sitll working.



Even the Agave beanstalk is requiring some support help now. Look at the poor beast, on the brink of collapse!



Stairway to Heaven.



Still not all things that are broken annoy me. This pot I got very cheap due to the fact that it is really half a pot! Strategically positioned and propped up, no-one would ever know its ugly little secret. I have utilised a couple of these cracked ceramics in my yard.



And this lock on my gate has never worked! – I love the rust aesthetic, amazing colors and texture, it is like the Titanic meets Alice in Wonderland. A really large wasp has taken up home in here.



“But I don’t want to go among mad people,” Alice remarked.
“Oh, you can’t help that,” said the Cat: “we’re all mad here. I’m mad. You’re mad.”
“How do you know I’m mad?” said Alice.
“You must be,” said the Cat, “or you wouldn’t have come here.” (Summer in Austin)

Speaking of going mad…



Rosemary must have a well drained soil. This is a nice plant for xeriscapes and combines well with Rudbeckia, Echinacea, Lantana, Verbena, and some Ornamental Grasses.

First of all can someone tell me, is it “prostrate” or “postrate” Rosemary? – there seems to be some debate on this, anyway I will be using the former.

I thought I would post a picture of this prostrate Rosemary to show how high you can grow them on a cedar carcass (see previous entry). This is a single plant with a cedar support structure that you cannot see anymore. This one is about 4 1/2 feet tall. This particular plant has had a sordid history, I bought it as a sprig, it was tiny, I proceeded to plant it in a rather random spot, then, by mistake, I proceeded to weed-whack it (twice) to literally an inch of it’s life. I then moved it to another random place three quarters of the way down my yard, before any pathways were in place – and there it has been for five years.

The prostrate Rosemary variety is one of my favorite plants, and for me, it always seems to do better than the upright variety (of which I have 7) that seem more prone to die-back and browning, especially after prolonged rain. Hardly any maintenance, drought tolerant, you cannot go wrong – and the bees swarm the tiny blue flowers. I grow this one next to 5 containerized Lavenders, a great companion planting. The spears on the upright Rosemary varieties make good skewers for chicken and lamb on the Barbi

e.

mmmmmm.

Other Things Observed:



This Bagpiper has an interesting brooch and hat-pin.



The Pampass and other Ornamental Grasses just sail through the Dog Days of Summer.



The term “Dog Days” was used by the Greeks. The Dog Days originally were the days when Sirius, the Dog Star, rose just before or at the same time as sunrise. The ancients sacrificed a brown dog at the beginning of the Dog Days to appease the rage of Sirius, believing that that star was the cause of the hot, sultry weather.



The Ivy on the other hand has turned into crispy bacon.



and ending on a slightly more cooler note, some pictures of my feeder tank. If you enlarge these the water looks like ice.



mmmmmmmm..crispy bacon and ice.


Stay Tuned for:

“Backyard OCD”


All material © 2009 for eastsidepatch. Unauthorized
intergalactic reproduction strictly prohibited, and
punishable by  late  (and extremely unpleasant)
14th century planet Earth techniques.

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